Take Melissa, who sent her guy an e-card, which was ignored. It wasn’t even opened by him.
When Melissa followed the ignored e-card with an email, she only reinforced his ignoring her, and made it that much more likely that he would continue to ignore her.
The mistake women often make after their first contact is ignored is to contact a man again! This gives him the opportunity to not just ignore her once, but twice!
Then it becomes official and it’s a pattern on his part that’s not likely to change.
When a woman contacts a man again (when he did not respond to her first attempt), she’s hammered the final nails in the coffin of their promising relationship.
So just why does this happen?
Psychologists tell us that people tend to behave in ways that are consistent with their recent behavior. When you get a man to take some kind of action once, he is extremely likely to continue acting in the same way.
Therefore, the last thing you want to do with a man who is ignoring you is to literally give him yet another opportunity to do so.
Not only that, but you risk becoming a persistent annoyance to him…a woman who isn’t “getting the hint.”
Obviously, that’s the last thing you want.
That’s why the smartest thing you can do when a man is ignoring you is to do nothing. No comments, no calls, no disapproval, no taking notice of the ignoring in any way.
When you continue to try to contact a man who is ignoring you, you completely lose your power in the relationship.
You are now chasing a man who has dropped you — and that’s a bad position that nobody wants to be in.
Every time you leave a new message or send another email to a man who hasn’t responded to your first email, all you are doing is prolonging the agony you may already be feeling.
You were already waiting for him to contact you like he used to do, and that was not happening. He knows it and you know it. But if you leave yet another message or send another email, it’s like allowing the situation to go back to square one.
It’s as if his ignoring you all this time no longer matters, since you’ve sent a brand new request for a response from him, instead of letting the silence speak for you.
If you continue to contact a guy who is not responding, you’re still being ignored, but from a fresh new point in time — your latest attempt to hear from him.
You may find yourself starting the waiting game all over again (even though you did this to yourself), since he’s still just as “gone” as he was in the first place.
Please don’t do this to yourself!
If by any chance that was the case, you would soon hear from him anyway — if your relationship really was solid.
Let him do the pursuing.
He will get in touch with you if he is attracted to you and if he’s ready, willing, able, and available for a relationship.
He already knows you’re interested in him because you’ve been kind, friendly and warm when you’re with him.
If you’d like to learn all about the effects of calling — or not calling — the men you date, check out my book and…
About the Author:
Mimi Tanner is a dating and relationship expert and the author of The Complete Guide to Calling and Emailing the Men You Date and numerous other books and programs on how to get and keep the man you want.
Mimi has helped countless women create loving, lasting relationships with the man of their dreams.
Which amazing women in your life would love to know how the correct kind of communication can capture and keep a man’s attention, admiration and desire?
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