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Are You Making This Harmful Relationship Mistake?
Posted By Evan Marc Katz On December 18th, 2012 @ 7:03 am In Relationships | No Comments
You have so much in common and can talk about anything. He knows how to make you laugh. Plus, the chemistry is off the charts.
You can’t believe your luck. You’ve finally met that special guy who makes you weak in the knees.
There’s just one problem…deep down, you feel uneasy.
No matter how much fun you have together and how much he seems to care about you, you keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I understand this problem. In fact, I’m something of an expert on it. And I’m here to tell you that you can learn to relax and enjoy your new relationship !
Even though you’re thrilled with your new love, that nagging voice inside your head says, “If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.”
You wonder when you’ll see his true colors, and obsess over his commitment to you and the relationship.
You might think you’re crazy to worry about something that hasn’t happened yet…
But please understand that it’s not your fault.
I know you’ve been down this road before…
The perfect man enters your life, and you both fall head over heels for each other.
Then without warning…he stops calling!
You can’t bear the thought that your new man will do what the others did and disappear from your life, leaving you bewildered and heartbroken.
So, you do what you’ve always done…start obsessing over his every move.
You don’t let your cell phone out of your sight in case he calls.
You check your email every 15 minutes.
You lose sleep.
You want so badly for the relationship to work…
That you’ve completely forgotten about the most important person in your life: YOU!
You’re a smart, rational, successful woman — but now you’re just a shadow of yourself because you’re SO anxious about what’s going to happen with Mr. Right.
They tend to overlook an important truth about relationships…
You can’t control what a man is going to do because he will make up his own mind. A man will call when he decides to call and commit when he wants to commit.
How do I know this?
Well, for one thing, I’m a man, and for another, through my experience as a dating coach, I’ve seen confident women struggle in their relationships because they forget all about this simple truth while Mr. Right heads straight for the door.
The problem is, turning yourself into a nervous wreck and analyzing everything about your man will drive him away every time.
Your deep-rooted fear and need to control the relationship is what’s going to bring it to a quick and sad end — I guarantee it.
So what should you do about this negative cycle? The answer is simple — nothing!
If he hasn’t made plans to meet you during the weekend and it’s already Friday afternoon, don’t “nudge” him into action by calling him.
If you’ve been dating for a few weeks and he hasn’t mentioned commitment, don’t sit down and have “The Talk.”
If he hasn’t replied to the text you sent 8 hours ago, don’t call him and question him about the delay.
I know this sounds strange and it’s probably going to take a while for you to get used to the idea…
But when it comes to keeping a man interested , the less you do, the more he’ll come running.
Trying to get a man to do what you want lets him know that you’re needy and insecure.
Even worse, it shows that you believe he doesn’t know how to run his life and that he needs help from you.
Men are pretty straightforward. When a guy’s excited about a future with you, you’ll know.
He’ll call, keep his dates with you, follow through, and be a perfect gentleman.
So, now that you know you’re not supposed to DO anything, what’s next?
In the beginning of an exciting, new relationship, you only need to do one thing: relax and enjoy the ride.
Enjoy yourself, relish the moment, relax, laugh and look forward to discovering more as the two of you naturally become closer.
Your man will be putty in your hands when you give him time to make a decision about your future together, on his own.
If he’s the right man for you, he’ll come knocking on your door, asking you for commitment because he can’t bear the thought of losing you.
The wrong guy will play “hard to get” and keep you hanging.
The right guy for you knows what to do to keep you in his life.
If you’re a strong, smart, successful woman who’s tired of feeling powerless in relationships, I recommend that you read my book, Why He Disappeared . I wrote it for you.
In it, you’ll learn more ways to stop obsessing over your relationship and get more control over your life so you can start enjoying the romance you deserve !
About the Author:
As a self-described “personal trainer for women who want to fall in love,” he helps women understand men — what they think, how they act, and what they really want — and empowers them to make healthy, informed choices in love.
He is the author of several books on dating including Why He Disappeared , which teaches women the real reason a man will suddenly “disappear” from your life…even if he seemed into you or told you he loved you.
Which wonderful women in your life could use a little more insight into their romantic relationships?
Share this romance wisdom with each of them by using the social media and email buttons below.
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